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Jim Cramer said on his "Mad Money Lightning Round" last night that he would buy Microsoft ( MSFT - Get Report) "hand over fist."

But when one caller asked what he thought of Rite Aid ( RAD), Cramer harrumphed: "What are you, a worst-of-breed person?"

Cramer also said he wants Krispy Kreme ( KKD) "sold right now."

'Lightning Round'

Bullish

Cramer was bullish on Martha Stewart Living Omnimedia ( MSO), Apple Computer ( AAPL - Get Report), XM Satellite Radio ( XMSR), Thermo Electron ( TMO), Global Signal ( GSL - Get Report), Comcast ( CMCSA - Get Report), Allegheny Technologies ( ATI), Syneron ( ELOS), Sears Holdings ( SHLD), Google ( GOOG), Aramark ( RMK), Commerce Bancorp ( CBH - Get Report), Wachovia ( WB - Get Report), Walgreen ( WAG), CVS ( CVS - Get Report), Johnson & Johnson ( JNJ - Get Report), St. Jude Medical ( STJ), Microsoft, EnPro Industries ( NPO - Get Report), TurboChef Technologies ( OVEN), LSI Logic ( LSI - Get Report) and IntraLase ( ILSE)

Bearish

Cramer was bearish on Sirius Satellite Radio ( SIRI), Grey Wolf ( GW), Micromuse ( MUSE), Accenture ( ACN), Arris Group ( ARRS), Brunswick ( BC), U.S. Steel ( X), Adobe Systems ( ADBE), Palomar Medical Technologies ( PMTI), Travelzoo ( TZOO), ISIS Pharmaceuticals ( ISIS), TALX ( TALX), Baidu.com ( BIDU), Centerplate ( CVP), Huntington Bancshares ( HBAN), Fifth Third Bancorp ( FITB), Unova ( UNA), Symbol Technologies ( SBL), Zebra Technologies ( ZBRA), salesforce.com ( CRM), Rite Aid ( RAD), AngioDynamics ( ANGO), WCI Communities ( WCI), Krispy Kreme Doughnuts ( KKD), Asta Funding ( ASFI) and EnCana ( ECA - Get Report).

1. Pigs Get Slaughtered 2. It's OK to Pay the Taxes
3. Don't Buy All at Once 4. Buy Damaged Stocks
5. Diversify to Control Risk 6. Do Your Homework
7. Don't Panic 8. Buy Best-of-Breed
9. Defend Some Stocks 10. Don't Bet on Bad Stocks
11. Own Fewer Names 12. Cash Is for Winners
13. No Regrets 14. Expect Corrections
15. Know Bonds 16. Don't Subsidize Losers
17. No Room for Hope 18. Be Flexible
19. Quit When Execs Do 20. Patience Is a Virtue
21. Be a TV Critic 22. When to Wait 30 Days
23. Beware the Hype 24. Explain Your Picks
25. Find the Bull Market

At the time of publication, Cramer was long Aramark, Comcast, Commerce Bancorp, EnCana, Microsoft and Sears Holdings.

James J. Cramer is a director and co-founder of TheStreet.com. He contributes daily market commentary for TheStreet.com's sites and serves as an adviser to the company's CEO. Outside contributing columnists for TheStreet.com and RealMoney.com, including Cramer, may, from time to time, write about stocks in which they have a position. In such cases, appropriate disclosure is made. To see his personal portfolio and find out what trades Cramer will make before he makes them, sign up for ActionAlertsPLUS. While he cannot provide personalized investment advice or recommendations, he invites you to send comments on his column by clicking here. Listen to Cramer's RealMoney Radio show on your computer; just click here. Watch Cramer on "Mad Money" at 6 p.m. ET weeknights on CNBC. Click here to order Cramer's latest book, "Real Money: Sane Investing in an Insane World," click here to get his second book, "You Got Screwed!" and click here to order Cramer's autobiography, "Confessions of a Street Addict."