Using a Coupon for Valentine’s Day: Frugal or Tacky?

NEW YORK (MainStreet) – Deal sites have been hard at work these past few weeks churning out special offers and voucher codes that provide discounts on traditional Valentine’s Day gifts. Groupon, for instance, offered a $40 credit toward FTD.com for $20, while LivingSocial offered a similar deal for Teleflora. But is it tacky to go hunting for special deals and coupon codes to get a present for the special someone in your life?

Most people don’t seem to think so. Deal site RetailMeNot recently conducted a survey in which they asked people in relationships how they would feel about their loved one using a coupon to save money on Valentine’s Day gifts. The results were overwhelming: 80% said they would be “happy” to hear that their significant other saved some money, while just 10% thought that using a coupon made them cheap.

Leah Ingram, who has written books on gifting and etiquette and runs the Suddenly Frugal blog, says that as long as you remember the holiday and buy a thoughtful gift, there’s no shame in using a coupon to save a bit of money.

“You really shouldn’t judge the quality of a gift by how much it costs – that is incredibly tacky,” she says. “If you’re in a relationship where you need to worry about that, you don’t need an etiquette expert, you need a relationship counselor.”

There are, of course, some rules dictating the use of coupons on Valentine’s Day. If you’re going to be pulling out a Groupon at the end of a romantic meal, Ingram says you might want to give your partner a heads-up in advance, and possibly make a self-effacing joke about your spendthrift ways. And while it’s OK to use a coupon or daily deal to purchase a gift, actually giving the coupon itself as a gift might cross an etiquette line if it comes off as a thoughtless, last-minute gesture. The cardinal rule of gifting always applies: It’s the thought that counts.

“To hand over a coupon for flowers or a meal out, that does seem like a cop-out,” Ingram says. “However there’s a lot of deals for what could be a romantic gift, like a manicure, pedicure, spa or even a day out paintballing. If you give something like that, that’s more personal, that’s OK.”

Matt Brownell is a staff reporter for MainStreet. You can reach him by email at matthew.brownell@thestreet.com, or follow him on Twitter @Brownellorama.