Let's listen in to the minds of the other Lycos (LCOS) directors -- hypothetically, of course, because, heck, that's no place to be when the Net's flying.

Let's get that mind meld going to see what they are thinking:

Hey, what's with this Wetherell from CMGI (CMGI) ? Just 'cause he's made fortunes upon fortunes for people, just because he has been a visionary about the Web, just 'cause his stock's doubled in the past month, why does he have to go muck things up for us? What the heck does he know about Lycos? What does he own, 20%? Where does he come off squawking? Why doesn't he just sell his darn stock if he is so ticked off? What a sorehead!! I mean, give me a break. Who is he to try to get a higher stock price? Doesn't he know that's not what the game is? That game is to do what Barry Diller says we should do. Diller knows: He has seen what happens with Home Shopping. He knows things run out. He knows what it's like when growth peters. Aren't we in the home shopping business anyway, kind of, already? I mean, like the Net is home shopping in a way. Also, shipping and handling, that's where the action is. We gotta get into shipping and handling -- maybe buy Pitney Bowes (PBI) - Get Report or how about Avery (AVY) - Get Report? -- to save a few bucks on the packaging. Heck, Wetherell, get with the program, why don't you? Ain't you ever had lunch at the Four Seasons? You think you can just get that good seat around the fountain by just saying "CMGI"? No way, doctor. That doesn't cut it. You gotta know somebody, and not just anybody. Right near those Redbook and ABC people. Way cool!! I say we issue a release saying something like "Nah nah nah nah nah nah," you know, the way big kids tease some little loser kid at the playground. Maybe send him a couple of nasty emails, 'cause we know he is into the Web. That ought to get the stock back down to where it was. Yeah, $83 or bust and not a penny more...

At that point, things went dark. Not even

Spock

could handle that overload of spite and still prosper. I had to let the mind meld break down, as I fear that spending too much time on that wavelength might force me to sell my

AOL

(AOL)

!!

James J. Cramer is manager of a hedge fund and co-founder of TheStreet.com. At the time of publication, his fund was long AOL, though positions may change at any time. Under no circumstances does the information in this column represent a recommendation to buy or sell stocks. Cramer's writings provide insights into the dynamics of money management and are not a solicitation for transactions. While he cannot provide investment advice or recommendations, he invites you to comment on his column by sending an email to letters@thestreet.com.