Task Rewrites, Recaps and Rehashes

Task is dashing off for TV land, but first: <I>CNBC's</I> Frank bites back, and more on analyst Whittington and the elusive Acampora.
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NEW YORK CITY -- The

TaskMaster

breaks from the traditional tonight because a) that's what this column is all about and b) I have to get out of the office early so I can make it to

Fox

in time for the taping of "

TheStreet.com" on cable TV's

Fox News Channel

.

Being that I've left cool and soothing San Francisco for the hot and steamy apple to make my debut on the show (plus I'm accompanying the

TaskMistress

to the wedding of her longtime friend), be sure to watch: Saturday at 10 a.m. EDT and Sunday at 1 p.m.

Meanwhile, everybody's "favorite"

CNBC

reporter waits until I give him a

compliment

to respond to my admittedly unprovoked

shots: "Listen to your boss. And get off my case Task Bastard!"

Steve Frank

emailed after I quoted

TSC

chieftain

Dave Kansas

making bullish

comments. "P.S.: You're not much to look at yourself."

That would hurt except I know it ain't true. And you can judge for yourself by watching "TheStreet.com" on

Fox News

this weekend. I may stumble over my words. There's a high possibility I may say something stupid, given

TSC's

show is unscripted vs. the tightly wrapped

CNBC

offerings. But I KNOW I'll look good. Or, at least, better than Frank.

(Now that's the kind of shameless self-promotion even

David Faber

would envy.)

Now then, on to today's rewrite, recap, and rehash. I figure if JJC can do it, why can't I? Rest assured, I've got some good, juicy tidbits "in the bag" for next week -- including more on stock-market astrology,

Tiger Management

, plus a hedge fund manager's unrestrained bullishness on a biotech stock.

The Recap (Cap, Cap)

Yesterday's piece about Richard Whittington, who resurfaced at

Banc of America Securities

after a walk on the buy-side included reports the analyst left

SoundView

because the firm -- fearing a backlash from its banking business -- refused to back his negative call on the chip industry in 1996.

A certain hedge fund manager, who shall remain nameless, retorts with the following: SoundView wouldn't back Whittington because he committed the unforgivable sin (in this town, at least) of turning bearish on

Yom Kippur

.

The "day of atonement," as it's also known, is the holiest day on the Jewish calendar --

Sandy Koufax, you'll recall, famously refused to pitch in the

World Series

on Yom Kippur. If Koufax could wait, why couldn't Whittington?

The analyst was unavailable for comment today.

Meanwhile, I reached SoundView to ask for their side of the story. But the firm declined to comment on the matter. At least I've got that base covered.

Where's Ralph?

Still haven't been able to track down Ralph Acampora, regarding how he's reconciling the

S&P 500

closing at 1281.43 on

Tuesday after the technician wrote Monday about how the

Dow

needed to stay above 10,334 and the S&P 500 above 1,292 for his forecasts to remain intact.

A source at

Prudential Securities

said Tuesday was "harrowing," but said the Dow and S&P must

both

close below Acampora's "huge caveats" to trigger a reanalysis of the estimates.

"It could still be a dead-cat bounce, but it looks like we're safe," the source said, both of the market and Acampora's forecasts.

Whew. That was close.

Applicable As Hell

Finally, I was trying to have fun last night with the "Red menace" at

CNBC

and their rumored decision to ban

TheStreet.com Internet Sector

index.

A network propagandist, err ... spokeswoman, said they will use the DOT "when applicable," but the

Dow Jones Internet Index

is the station's preferred gauge -- even though it is skewed by inclusion of the

Ciscos

(CSCO) - Get Report

of the world.

How's this for applicable: A marketing source here reports the DOT accounted for 62.7% of the transaction volume for all major Internet averages from March 1 through July 31. Additionally, the DOT has accounted for 60% of the average daily volume of Net proxies year-to-date.

Sooner or later,

CNBC

will have to kow-tow to the power that is the TaskMaster ... err, the DOT.

Aaron L. Task writes daily for TheStreet.com. In keeping with TSC's editorial policy, he doesn't own or short individual stocks, although he owns stock in TheStreet.com. He also doesn't invest in hedge funds or other private investment partnerships. He welcomes your feedback at

taskmaster@thestreet.com.

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