Things I am sick of hearing and what they really mean when you hear them:

"The breadth of the market is frighteningly narrow."

That means

: "I am in the wrong stocks, and believe me, if the market doesn't get cracked soon, I'm history."

"This dot-com craziness can't last forever."

That means

: "Be darned if I am going to learn these new stocks because I am busy sitting with

Freddie Mac

(FRE)

and

Wells Fargo

(WFC) - Get Report

."

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"The market is extremely overvalued."

That means

: "I am unwilling to do the homework to be in the hot stocks, especially because they trade in bizarre increments."

"The market shouldn't be going up because the bonds keep going down."

That means

: "I am using traditional measurements that kept me out of all of the stocks that went up and kept me into a bunch of losers."

"The transports kept me out of this market because of their bad performance."

That means

: "I am really scraping the bottom of the excuse barrel now."

"I don't know when this is going to end, but it is going to end badly."

That means

: "I am going to get canned for missing the

Red Hot and

B2B moves, so why not just badmouth this market and terrorize those who are doing better than I am."

James J. Cramer is manager of a hedge fund and co-founder of TheStreet.com. At time of publication, his fund had no positions in any stocks mentioned. Cramer's fund also may be long or short certain stocks in his B2B rotisserie league or Red Hot index. His fund often buys and sells securities that are the subject of his columns, both before and after the columns are published, and the positions that his fund takes may change at any time. Under no circumstances does the information in this column represent a recommendation to buy or sell stocks. Cramer's writings provide insights into the dynamics of money management and are not a solicitation for transactions. While he cannot provide investment advice or recommendations, he invites you to comment on his column at

jjcletters@thestreet.com.