This market must be driving people to drink! Get a load of that blowout number from

Anheuser Busch

(BUD) - Get Report

!

This opening has something for everybody. The bulls have to be happy with the action in

Nortel

(NT)

. The bears have to be rejoicing that

JDS Uniphase

(JDSU)

is not ramping despite higher guidance. The bulls must love the action in the

Brocades

(BRCD)

, which keep going up. The bears are dancing at the prospect of the end of the arms-merchant/pick-and-shovel thesis -- they are collapsing

Exodus

(EXDS)

and

Akamai

(AKAM) - Get Report

again.

Us? We are putting a little money to work, a la our

bottom thesis. Not much, but enough to make us feel some pain if the macro numbers tomorrow are as strong as they were today.

At this pace, Anheuser Busch will have to talk up numbers next quarter, too!

James J. Cramer is manager of a hedge fund and co-founder of TheStreet.com. At time of publication, his fund was long Brocade, JDS Uniphase and Nortel. His fund often buys and sells securities that are the subject of his columns, both before and after the columns are published, and the positions that his fund takes may change at any time. Under no circumstances does the information in this column represent a recommendation to buy or sell stocks. Cramer's writings provide insights into the dynamics of money management and are not a solicitation for transactions. While he cannot provide investment advice or recommendations, he invites you to comment on his column at

jjcletters@thestreet.com.