A Miranda Warning for This Market

There is new rule being enforced at Cramer Berkowitz -- and it's saving the trader money.
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We are instituting new rules at

Cramer Berkowitz

. When anybody suggests that we go to cover a short or start a new long position when the stock is up,

Matt "Not on my Watch" Jacobs

has to say, "Not a chance, you war criminal."

So, when someone here said, "Hey, how about buying back some

Intel

(INTC) - Get Report

" -- it was down a tad -- Matt was required to say, "Not a chance, you war criminal," which kept that somebody from buying Intel at 118, 117 and 116.

That way the penalty for buying something back that we get crushed on later in the day has less sting because nobody will do it any more. There was a time, between October 1999 and March 10, 2000 where it paid to reach. It paid to buy up-10 because someone else would take you out up-20. You had to buy them up to make money. Now, that's the stupidest strategy in the world. You take the

Veritas

(VRTS) - Get Report

up 10, you wear it home at a loss! Nasty.

That's why Matt now reads you your Miranda warning before you take stock up. Nobody wants to be a war criminal. This warning saved us a ton today. Maybe we will make it a ritual until the data slows, the holders change and the

Fed

gets off our back.

Random musings:

Hate the market? Hate everything about it? Then you probably won't want to be on my AOL chat this afternoon. But I am going to do it anyway. At 5 p.m. Be there or be square ...

Federal Mogul

(FMO) - Get Report

blows up ... Auto-parts weakness in Europe and America.

James J. Cramer is manager of a hedge fund and co-founder of TheStreet.com. At time of publication, his fund was long Intel. His fund often buys and sells securities that are the subject of his columns, both before and after the columns are published, and the positions that his fund takes may change at any time. Under no circumstances does the information in this column represent a recommendation to buy or sell stocks. Cramer's writings provide insights into the dynamics of money management and are not a solicitation for transactions. While he cannot provide investment advice or recommendations, he invites you to comment on his column at

jjcletters@thestreet.com.