Twenty-four hour trading? I'll believe it when I see it. For years now, we've had the ability to trade 24 hours a day. But I will let you in on a big secret: I am the only guy on earth who does it.
I can't tell you how many times I have tried to get people to trade with me when I come in from work. Even two hours after I get in, I still can't get people to pick up the phone. If it weren't for a couple of guys who know that I mean business, I would tell you that 24-hour trading is a colossal joke.
Each morning, I come in here and try to find out where
is, or where
are. Every day I want to do a trade in something American that is supposed to have a two-way market. I have to beg people to trade with me.
-- I am ready to roll the moment I get in.
"Trade with me, &$^%*. Trade with me," I scream into the phone, which might as well be of the
variety since nobody's ever home on the other line.
Are they worried that I will smoke them? Are they afraid that they will be picked off by a wise guy? Do they fear my raw intellect and trading prowess?
Nah -- they're just sleeping in. Nobody likes coming in early in this business. Nobody. You think guys want to sleep two hours less so they can trade 5,000 Nokia with a couple of people? I don't think so.
Until they come up with drugs that replicate my ridiculous metabolism, you can bet that 24-hour trading will be the repository of me and two or three other guys who wish they didn't have to trade with me but have to.
I hope I am wrong, but I know I will be right.
Have these Congressmen gotten better manners, or did they read
James J. Cramer is manager of a hedge fund and co-founder of TheStreet.com. At the time of publication, his fund was long Intel, America Online and Yahoo!, though positions may change at any time. Under no circumstances does the information in this column represent a recommendation to buy or sell stocks. Cramer's writings provide insights into the dynamics of money management and are not a solicitation for transactions. While he cannot provide investment advice or recommendations, he invites you to comment on his column by sending a letter to TheStreet.com.