Editor's Note: Welcome to "Funny Money," a feature written by New York-based comedian Jeff Kreisler. Lest there be any confusion, please note that this column is a work of satire and intended for entertainment purposes only. Enjoy the weekend.
Ken Lay and Jeffrey Skilling: guilty. The former Enron honchos should've skipped the Scooby-Doo "Rrrrrrrr-I didn't know" defense for the "I did not have fraud with that company" and then pointed to Fannie Mae, which got a spanking too this week.
A report from Fannie's regulator said the company's financials were "illusions" created by execs in a $11 billion scheme. Oddly enough, "Illusions" is also the name of the summer tour starring Fannie Mae, her cousin Daisy Duke and her sister/aunt/nanny Britney Spears.
In other scandalous developments, executives in charge of retailer Royal Ahold were convicted of fraud this week, when a Dutch jury found them to be "A couple of Royal pains in the Ahold." ...
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