This Day On The Street
Continue to site
This account is pending registration confirmation. Please click on the link within the confirmation email previously sent you to complete registration.
Need a new registration confirmation email? Click here

How America Killed the Live Event

PORTLAND, Ore. ( TheStreet) -- Oct. 3 was apparently Freelance Psychotherapist Night at the Newmark Theater here in Portland. Somebody really should have told Fiona Apple this before she got on stage.

It wasn't really an issue until about the tail end of the singer's performance, when one of the clearly trained professionals in question opted to waive her fee and offer Apple some advice free of charge: "Fiona! Get Healthy! We Want To See You In 10 Years!"

Her colleagues, apparently not sharing the same view of Apple's aesthetic tells as this particular woman, lustily advised her to cram a notebook in it. Apple, for her part, made a simple request -- peppered with colorful adjectives -- to have the house lights brought up so she could see this woman being ejected from the room. That chafed against professional ethic of yet another of the theater's ubiquitous therapists on hand, who implied that Apple's best days may be behind her, remarking that "I saw you 20 years ago and you were beautiful."

As early and unexpected therapy sessions often do, this got the better of Apple's emotions and forced her from the stage after a rendition of "Waltz (Better Than Fine)" before her allotted hour was up. What did she take away from her windfall of free life lessons: That she'd just endured a "historically stupid night" and that she's "not going to try to convince someone I'm healthy."

Since there are a few people in this town who've now doled out their painstakingly detailed and researched analysis and received nothing in return -- not even thanks for what they know to be a good deed -- let us repay the favor with some advice of our own: Just shut it. Seriously, shut up. The price you willingly paid for a ticket -- no matter how high it might have been -- entitles you only to the performance and, perhaps, a seat. Nobody else who paid that same price did so to hear your thoughts on the proceedings or any other interjection you may have on hand.

In this forum, your words are worthless -- of no value whatsoever. Even worse, they only diminish the value of the tickets being held within earshot of you and do irreparable damage to the live concert experience in general. In fact, they so degrade the communal experience in general that they turn other patrons away in droves each year.
1 of 2

Check Out Our Best Services for Investors

Action Alerts PLUS

Portfolio Manager Jim Cramer and Director of Research Jack Mohr reveal their investment tactics while giving advanced notice before every trade.

Product Features:
  • $2.5+ million portfolio
  • Large-cap and dividend focus
  • Intraday trade alerts from Cramer
Quant Ratings

Access the tool that DOMINATES the Russell 2000 and the S&P 500.

Product Features:
  • Buy, hold, or sell recommendations for over 4,300 stocks
  • Unlimited research reports on your favorite stocks
  • A custom stock screener
Stocks Under $10

David Peltier uncovers low dollar stocks with serious upside potential that are flying under Wall Street's radar.

Product Features:
  • Model portfolio
  • Stocks trading below $10
  • Intraday trade alerts
14-Days Free
Only $9.95
14-Days Free
Dividend Stock Advisor

David Peltier identifies the best of breed dividend stocks that will pay a reliable AND significant income stream.

Product Features:
  • Diversified model portfolio of dividend stocks
  • Updates with exact steps to take - BUY, HOLD, SELL
Trifecta Stocks

Every recommendation goes through 3 layers of intense scrutiny—quantitative, fundamental and technical analysis—to maximize profit potential and minimize risk.

Product Features:
  • Model Portfolio
  • Intra Day Trade alerts
  • Access to Quant Ratings
Real Money

More than 30 investing pros with skin in the game give you actionable insight and investment ideas.

Product Features:
  • Access to Jim Cramer's daily blog
  • Intraday commentary and news
  • Real-time trading forums
Only $49.95
14-Days Free
14-Days Free
LYV $22.44 0.00%
TSLA $222.56 0.00%
YHOO $36.00 0.00%
AAPL $94.19 0.00%
FB $118.06 0.00%


Chart of I:DJI
DOW 17,651.26 -99.65 -0.56%
S&P 500 2,051.12 -12.25 -0.59%
NASDAQ 4,725.6390 -37.5850 -0.79%

Free Reports

Top Rated Stocks Top Rated Funds Top Rated ETFs