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If Steve Jobs Were Alive, He Would Fire Tim Cook

But, so what? It will not have a material impact on Apple's quarterly results. They set opening weekend records with iPhone 5. Apple will sell tens of millions of easily the best smartphone on the market. Nobody or nothing else even comes close.

As I have riffed since Jobs's death, Apple's future, not the present, is what should worry people who care one way or another about this stuff.

I observe Apple fanboys and fangirls with pity as they defend Tim Cook. He is the kind of guy Jobs would have fired.

And, yes, I know that Jobs hired him. Cook was a good solider. He's a master of the supply chain. On his death bed, Steve Jobs apparently told Tim Cook something like Don't ask what I would do, just do what's right. I know all of this.

I believe every bit of it.

But, you ride an incredibly slippery slope when you use these facts to argue that (A) Jobs would not be furious right now; (B) The above-mentioned details exonerate Cook from real consequences for the types of horrendous missteps Jobs never would have made; and (C) There's no difference between how Cook errs and responds to mistakes and how Jobs did.

As I explained on Friday in Apple Bull Case Laced With Sloppy, Bearish Holes, there's a difference between errors made during a time of revolutionary innovation and errors made while you're merely bringing along somebody else's inventions.

Not to mention what I thought were obvious distinctions exist between how Jobs reacted and how Cook reacts.

Jobs did not "apologize" for iPhone 4 antenna issues as much as he chided the complainers. Avoid holding it that way. Now, run along with a free case for your phone.

And just think about how beside himself Jobs would be if he was around to see Cook offer Google and Nokia (NOK) Maps as alternatives while Apple gets its act together. Tim Cook actually told people that they might be better off with what freaking Nokia produces than something Designed by Apple in California.

I think I have a decent way with words, however, I cannot find any even close to appropriate to illustrate how flabbergasted I am right now. If Jobs was alive and just slid into a Chairman or Director role, Cook would have been writing his resignation letter, not a sappy apology on Friday.

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