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2012 Super Bowl Commercials: Sneak Preview (Update 1)

Congratulations, Audi! Even your $200,000 R8 5.2's 530-horsepower engine and 3.7-second 0-to-60 acceleration couldn't keep you from being about four years late to the vampire party.

Listen, we get it. Your overall U.S. sales were up nearly 16% last year, while car sales jumped more than 19%. That's worth crowing about and likely inspired you to take the leap yet again and spend $7 million on a 60-second ad.

But vampires? Really? Even the oldest Twilight followers and True Blood fans realize much of the life has been sucked out of that trend. We're totally into post-apocalyptic survival fiction now. You know, like The Running Man or Battle Royale written for eighth-graders.

Besides, you're positioning yourself in a U.S. car market that you have a scant 0.9% of and the car feature you really want to focus on is its headlights? While the LED headlamps are great and all, anyone who's ever stared down one of your vehicles at night in an oncoming lane and spent the next two minutes trying to clear the spots from their eyes knows you're trying to harness the power of the sun in each headlamp. They don't exactly like you for that.

We know that Toyota's troubles in the wake of recalls and last year's Japanese earthquake, tsunami and subsequent power outages took some of horsepower out of its Lexus luxury brand and dropped its U.S. sales by nearly 11%. In the race to pick up that share, however, you shouldn't be leaving the creativity of last year's Goodnight Moon-style ad in the dust. Stop draining the last drops out of vampire culture, quit pandering to Gen-X with old Echo & The Bunnymen songs (especially the well-worn "Killing Moon") and start focusing on the fast, fun machines your customers love.

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