When Should 'My' Money Become 'Ours'?

If they do decide to tie the knot one day, the couple has agreed to maintain separate accounts as well as a joint one.

"If I want to go out and buy a new gadget or instrument," he says, "it would come out of my account, not the mutual account."

Still, it's important to open up your finances when committing to marriage, says Vincent Barbera, director of financial planning at TGS Financial Advisors. He suggests couples open a joint account six months before the wedding and put all the gift money into it once the knot is tied. He also says couples should "put everything out on the table" -- credit cards, loans, salary and assets -- way before setting a date.

"Money can be a difficult thing when you're married if you're not open about it from the start," he says. "Immediately there's a wall being put up if you're unwilling to share information."

When it comes to the bills, some cohabitating couples split them down the middle, regardless of income or consumption. Others, like Bergman and his girlfriend, divide costs relative to salary -- though arguments often occur when one partner thinks the other isn't pulling his or her weight.

Libby Haydel and Bo Booty have been dating for over six years, and started living together about a year ago in Baton Rouge, La. Though Haydel says that Booty, a civil engineer, makes "a good bit more" than she does, they split the rent and utilities down the middle. The equation evens out because he pays for vacations and dining out.

However, food shopping has become a sore subject.

"Grocery shopping can get to be tit-for-tat sometimes," says Haydel, a 27-year-old magazine editor. "I feel really stingy -- we ended up having an argument over me buying ground meat for dinner. I'm like, 'I bought the chicken last night!'"

In other cases, the opposite issue comes up.

R. Scott Wells and his girlfriend Liz once shared costs equally, but now he pays for nearly everything because he earns a good deal more. Now Liz feels like a burden.

"She's used to being very independent, so I think it's been tough for her to have me buy her stuff and pay bills," says Wells. "We also have different money styles -- she's more of a saver and I like to spend," he later adds.

The couple recently had a discussion so that each could understand where the other was coming from, even if it didn't resolve the situation entirely.

"Communication is key," says Wells. "You might not always see eye to eye, but making the effort is important."