Five Bizarre Entries in Banking Fine Print

3. We really want you to know what's written in the second column of page 32 of your Account Rules and Regulations. Really. It says so right there.

If you -- for some reason -- happen to have suffered through 32 pages of account descriptions and legalese in Chase's "Account Rules and Regulations" you'll be rewarded.

In the second paragraph of the second column (no "Beware of the Leopard" sign, though) consumers are advised -- in all caps -- to "PLEASE READ THIS PROVISION CAREFULLY."

The buried provision advices clients that they've given up their first amendment right to a day in court: Instead they must go through arbitration.

Think Judge Judy with closed proceedings. The arbitration administrators are dependent on the bank for business, depending on the administrator they may or may not be bound to follow the law and decisions are subject to minimal judicial oversight.

You can guess which party wins the vast majority of the time.

Plus the arbitration administrators forbid class action suits, which means banks have carte blanche to nickel and dime you without fear of legal reprisal.

But that's not all: In previous clauses Chase also eschewed any responsibility for determining whether a court has any authority over your account before freezing your money. They have a freeze-first-let-you-work-it-out-with-the-unauthorized-entity-later policy. And you're responsible for any costs the bank incurs in the process.

And if they make a mistake and accept a forged check, any problems you have as a result -- even if you warned them of the risk beforehand -- are your problem. You might get the money put back into your account, but you can't go after Chase for resulting damages.

All of these clauses are standard banking practice. Perhaps the only thing that makes Chase unique is that the three provisions all occur in a cluster on page 32.