Maven: GDP and Punishment

Instead, they incredibly, imbecilely (Is that even a word?), inarticulately (I'm pretty sure that one is.) draw hard-and-fast solutions about what that original number -- the number that probably means nothing -- says about the economy. Investors have been constantly misled into believing we were on the cusp of recession when economic growth was actually 50% higher than initially reported, or duped into thinking economic performance was better than it was later revised to be.

This is no mark of political bias in the business journalism world; the same thing has happened under Democratic and Republican rule. This is just habitual laziness, being hypnotized by the old, incompetent way you've always done things. Things have gotten slightly better lately, with a few mentions of the original number's short shelf life appearing in initial reports, for which I take total credit. But you can't teach old dogs new tricks.

When fourth-quarter GDP was reported a couple of weeks ago, many business journalists took that impermanent 3.5% growth number and ran with all manner of conclusions, forcing false notions down the gullet of unsuspecting investors.

Well, after warning upon warning about doing that, this report is the last straw. As I've warned I would in defense of investors everywhere, I finally have penned a limerick making fun of several of these almost willfully ignorant journalists by name. I hope I won't have to do this again. But you watch, I'm just crazy enough to. (Note to nitpicking readers: If my limerick form is not perfect, forgive me. As I said, I'm a failed poet. Remember that this is for a larger cause.)

Ugh-ugh-ugh
When it comes to GDP reporting
You're fit for a plug
Said Jeremy Peters, "It's 3.5."
Joanne Morrison and Jeannine Aversa
Kept 53 misperceptions alive
Investors, you're getting a tug, so shrug or you'll be mugged.