The Five Dumbest Things on Wall Street This Week

4. Monstrous Burdens

It's open season on top execs in the stock-option backdating scandal.

CEOs at online security company McAfee (MFE Quote), tech publisher CNet (CNET Quote) and wireless shop Boston Communications (BCGI Quote) all quit this week amid investigations of stock-option chicanery.

Some of the departing chieftains were predictably repentant, what with regulators and prosecutors showing increasing interest in the matter.

"I regret that some of the stock-option problems identified by the Special Committee occurred on my watch," said McAfee's George Samenuk.

And true to form, their replacements wasted no time in promising pained investors dearly desired closure.

"Innovation is part of our DNA," said new CNet chief Neil Ashe, "and will be fundamental to our success moving forward."

But perhaps the best story came from online jobs company Monster Worldwide (MNST Quote). New York-based Monster said in June that "a committee of independent directors" has been reviewing its stock-option practices. On Monday, it bid adieu to longtime CEO Andrew McKelvey.

So what drove the 71-year-old McKelvey from Monster's penthouse suite? Not a possible Nasdaq delisting or the probable need to restate earnings, surely. Can last month's suspension of Monster's top lawyer have possibly been a factor?

No, no, a thousand times no. Poor McKelvey was just way too busy.

"At this stage in my life," McKelvey said Monday, "I simply can no longer dedicate the number of hours required by Monster's rapid global growth and the additional demands of time associated with the ongoing historical stock-option grant review."

Maybe that kind of effort isn't part of his DNA.

Dumb-o-Meter score: 82. "Too busy" is certainly an innovative excuse.