Rocco: Cool and Casual

The Good Life is something I talk about a lot. In my books, and on radio and TV, I actually tell people to "grab the good life." My hope is to empower the everyday guy, who is likely more afraid of entertaining than of death itself, to grab his fair share of the good life.

The good life is not a specific food, wine or place. It's not only Daniel Boulud's "Scallops In Black Tie." For some, it's boxed brownie mix. The good life happens in the space between people, and it requires an attitude and a belief system that anything is possible when sharing a pure moment with friends, family or loved ones.

For almost two years now, I have been entertaining at home on my own. No armies of kitchen soldiers and no muscular stoves. I experience what the everyday person does when entertaining at home. It's a scary place. I can now add the kitchen and the dining room to the list of rooms where I feel performance anxiety. I mistakenly thought that because I knew how to cook and entertain professionally, I would know how to do it at home. Boy, was I wrong. But it doesn't have to be scary; it doesn't have to cause anxiety if you treat it casually.

I was recently asked what my style of entertaining was: formal or casual? And my response was: casual, casual, casual. But what does casual mean? The answer is that it means something different to each of us, but the endgame is the same. Enjoy the company and energy of other people without creating more stress than pleasure.

That's what I believe casual living is about. Enjoy moments, small and large, intense and subtle -- a smile, a breeze, a great espresso. In order for me to practice what I preach, I had to make important decisions. Am I doing it to make others happy? Or to provide myself with a showcase for my skills, home, style and things?