The Five Dumbest Things on Wall Street This Week

1. Speaking of Which, the National Retail Federation Has Launched a Campaign Called 'Got Possessions?'

Apparently, AT&T T thinks it's a good idea for people to talk to other people important in their lives.

Hard to believe, huh?

Yes, just in case people have forgotten they're supposed to spend some quality time with the family, Ma Bell said this week that it is launching an advertising campaign titled "Talk Is Good." The ad campaign "invites consumers to keep an open dialogue with the most important people in their lives," reads a statement attributed to Cathy Constable, AT&T Consumer's vice president of marketing services.

We'll skip the part here where we debate the application of this message in the world of geopolitical events. Instead, we'll explore some other subtexts of this particular campaign.

Especially given the other comments in AT&T's announcement of the new advertisements.

"Our findings confirmed that consumers are communicating more than ever before," says Constable. "Of course, along with that increase, consumers are receiving more than their fair share of unwanted messages and clutter."

Making Alexander Graham Bell Smile

Hmm. Could it be that AT&T is dissing the Internet-based communications fad -- you know, email and instant messaging?

"AT&T is and has always been committed to the idea of better communication, as opposed to simply more communication," says Ann Hayden, an executive at Y&R Advertising who worked on the campaign.

Double hmm. Could it be that AT&T is dissing all the people who have signed up for wireless phone service from companies such as Sprint PCS PCS -- all-you-can-talk plans that eat into AT&T's long-distance and local wireline revenues?

OK, OK. Maybe AT&T isn't so Dumb for evading the issue here. Maybe "Talk Is Good" is simply a lot less embarrassing than "Please Don't Adopt New Communications Media or You'll Run Us Out of Business."

2. Oh Yeah, That Guy

Speaking of the honored corporate communications technique of misdirection, how about the folks at Charter Communications CHTR?

The nowhere-to-go-but-up cable TV operator -- which earlier this year sacked its chief operating officer and chief financial officer in a move related to a grand jury investigation of its accounting practices -- accentuated the positive this week, personnel-wise.

The company, which is going through its second restructuring in a year, announced the appointment of three new executives to the company this week, noting the appointments in three different press releases totaling more than 1,000 words.

"Investor confidence and employee morale will continue to be revitalized as we execute on the organizational restructuring plan we announced last October with high-level appointments like these," said Charter CEO Carl Vogel in one of the press releases.

Buried Treasurer

The company was less forthcoming, however, about one high-level employee departure. To mark the resignation of longtime treasurer Ralph Kelly, the company issued a terse 8-K and left it at that.

Keep in mind that the investigation of Charter's finances is ongoing, though there's no hint that Kelly's been involved in any alleged wrongdoing. And keep in mind that Wall Street has been worrying that Charter's solvency could be further jolted by the possibility it might not be able to file its 2002 financial statements by its March 31 deadline. So the fate of the company treasurer, one might point out, might also have a wee bit of an effect on investor confidence and company morale.

A Charter spokesman says Kelly's departure will have no effect on the company's ability to file its financial reports in a timely manner, nor has the resignation any effect on, or relationship to, any ongoing investigations of the company.