The Five Dumbest Things on Wall Street This Week

Now, we don't know when this alleged hotel bill was incurred -- Boies doesn't say, and a Tyco spokesman didn't have details at the ready -- but at current exchange rates, 5,288 pounds translates into $8,429 a night. Subtract 13 nights of that from Tyco's $110,000 bill, and you get $418 left over -- enough to get Mr. K. started on the tips for the driver et al.

Of course, maybe Kozlowski economized by staying elsewhere -- say, one of the 3,500-pound-per-night fleabag penthouses at Claridge's. In that case, we calculate it would cost Tyco's shareholders a mere $6,556 a night. Of course, then Kozlowski would have had $24,770 left over for the various and sundry items on his hotel bill.

Now, that's a lot of in-room movies.

2. Your Fabulous Caribbean Spews

Another day, another dollar. Another week, another reported case of nausea, vomiting and diarrhea aboard a luxury cruise ship.

Yes, last Friday Reuters reported that 80 passengers and crew members on Royal Caribbean Cruises' RCL Majesty of the Seas took ill with a bug resembling -- but not officially confirmed as -- the Norwalk-type flu virus that has sparked more than the usual level of seasickness over the past few months.