Bellows stresses that you can almost always get something extra, if you are prepared to support why you earned more in the way of separation benefits. But you have to be prepared, because you may have just moments before the boss turns you over to HR for that exit meeting. Her suggestions:

• Buy yourself time. Think about what projects you are working on that are not completed but are important and that no one else can do. You may not be able to talk the company out of termination, but you might be able to postpone your departure date, by noting how much more efficient it would be if you completed this project. For legal reasons, the company may not be able to make exceptions to severance policy, but they could extend your termination several months into the future, giving you more time to prepare. (And by then, they may determine that business is better and rescind your layoff!) If you don't have that kind of project going, start one now -- one that only you can do!
• Ask for your bonus. You've earned your bonus by working this year, why should someone else get your bonus? There may not be a bonus for everyone, but if there is any bonus this year, and you earned it, you must ASK FOR IT! Compare yourself to a peer, and say you want the same bonus. You should be treated equally for the work you've done, unless you're being fired as a non-performer.
• Get personal references now. Get a commitment from your direct boss immediately after he tells you that you're being laid off. He or she will be most vulnerable at this moment -- and you may never see the boss in person again! So ask if you can 'write your own' reference, which you'd then give or email to him. He can make adjustments, print it out and mail it back to you.

  And when you write that letter, don't be humble, says Bellows, no matter what your job level. This is the time to remember all the good things you did for the company, so you'll have a personal reference that is more than the dates you worked for them.

• Get outplacement assistance. Even if they don't offer this service to everyone, you can request this help to sweeten your departure, but you must convince them you earned it. And senior executives should demand appropriate category of outplacement. Bellows notes that senior executives should ask to approve the wording of the announcement of their departure.

When all else fails, says Bellows, you can turn to leverage -- both the positive and the negative kind of personal pressure that could change your situation. She suggests that if you're worried about being terminated, you try to head it off by talking with superiors who could go to bat for you at higher levels.

And if you are terminated, she advises that you not be reluctant to talk about special circumstances, such as a family illness, that would be impacted by loss of your medical coverage, even with the COBRA 18-month extension. Says Bellows: "This is the time to call in your chips!"

On the negative leverage side, you may feel that you haven't been treated equally -- whether in your past pay levels, or in being unfairly chosen for termination on the basis of race, gender, age or sexual orientation. To make this kind of case, you need a competent attorney. But you should never threaten a lawsuit if you don't have supportable claims. Bellows responds to employment law questions on her blog at www.Bellowspc.com.

These ideas should help cushion the blow of losing your job, but they won't erase the knot in your stomach that comes from wondering what you'll do without a paycheck. It's small consolation that your job that disappeared along with millions of others. In fact, that only makes job-hunting more difficult.

But we will get through this tough recession. You may have to rely on help from family, friends and government benefits. But one day you'll once again be in a position to give back to those who helped you. And that's The Savage Truth.