Buzz Pumps the Market

We pulled up with Buzz Gould during a marketing tour in Las Vegas, Nev., this morning. He was his old effusive self and it was a pleasure to hear him back in his offensive mode. Here are the results of the Q&A.

Cramer: Buzz, how did it go yesterday?

Buzz: We rallied 16% in the aggressive growth mutual fund and I could have made it 18%, but I decided I had moved Liberate (LBRT) and Portal Software (PRSF) enough for a day. My only regret was that I didn't walk BEAS (BEAS) back up to my basis of $85. Maybe that will be today's business.

(Grabs cell phone, hits 1, gets trading sidekick Batch Hammer: Batch, get Goldman (GS) short, some BEAS -- take it up to $85 and then nail it to $90 with Instinet. Blitzkrieg the thing, Batch, just like the old days. Back to Cramer.)

Cramer: So now you are up again for the year?

Buzz: Oh, we're back and bigger than ever. In fact I have grown quite bullish on the prospects of the market here.

Cramer: Hey Buzz, aren't you worried about the Fed getting tougher now that your kind of stocks are coming roaring back?

Buzz: My investors don't care about the Fed. My bosses don't care about the Fed. What is the deal with the Fed? Who cares about the Fed? The Fed only impacts P&G (PG) and USG (USG) and some of those companies my grandparents used to trade. Get a life, Cramer. That guy who called you an idiot yesterday -- yeah, I read your column -- he may have had a point. Oh yeah, thanks for boosting AOL (AOL) for me today. I was able to blow out a bunch of stock right into your hype! (Laughs.)

Cramer: So what happens now, the Nasdaq just goes right back up as if nothing ever happened? Even though some of your compadres are down 40% to 80%?

Buzz: We are concerned about some of the weaker hands in our mutual fund buying club. Monday night at Privilege (special emergency meeting of the Young Turks) we agreed to do what we call a "Marshall Plan" to bail out our weakened compatriots. You saw some of our handiwork yesterday with all of those highflying Nasdaq stocks we walked up.

We all go in and buy a ton of the hammered fund's top 10 holdings. We put those guys back up on their feet so they can do some buying in no time. I wouldn't worry. Our Marshall Plan buyings always work. We are seasoned at bailing out our buddies. We have to do it a couple of times a year, but it sure does spook the shorts. Hoo-hah! Betcha Julian wished he had a Marshall plan going. But who can walk up Letter U (U) and Bowater (BOW). P-U!

Cramer: How about IBM (IBM) and Intel (INTC)? Are they going to hurt you today?

Buzz: How much is Intel down?

Cramer: Five points right now.

Buzz: Hmmmm, let me take care of that. (Flips cellphone back on. Batchy. Batchy Hammer, listen, go buy 2000 Intel April 125 calls -- I don't care that they go out tomorrow -- try to get Morgan Stanley short. Then take 1000 calls from Goldman, same contract. Makes sure you are doing it simultaneously. When they are in trying to cover their short, go into Merrill as a size buyer, take 250,000 and then bid it at $126 in the Box!)

Jim, I don't think you will have to worry much longer about Intel. What was that other company?

Cramer: IBM.

Buzz: Well, why don't you just ask me about Bessie Steel (BS) for Pete's sake? Hey listen, I would love to shmoooze more here, but I gotta money show I have to give where I am predicting Nazzdog 6000 and I just want to check my charts out before I give my recommendations. Back to ya!

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